Writing Characters of the Opposite Sex #OpenBook Blog Hop

June 10, 2019

What’s the most difficult thing about writing characters from the opposite sex?

You know those silly on-line quizzes that tell you what superhero you are? Or which Star Trek character? Or whether you think like a male or a female?

So, according to those, I’m Spock and I think like male 70% of  the time. Since I grew hanging around with five brothers, it doesn’t surprise me too much. I’m also employed in a field comprised mostly of males, and get along well with my coworkers. I guess that gives me an advantage when writing my male characters. It doesn’t mean I know everything that goes on in a male mind. 

When a reviewer complimented me on how well I wrote my female characters, I was puzzled. So, I asked her about it. Turns out she thought I was a guy based on how well-written my male characters were! I’ll take that as a compliment.

Here’s the catch: I rarely write from a male point of view. I like strong female characters, and that’s what POV I write from. That means I don’t have to dive too deeply into the male psyche. The males are written thru the eyes of my women. I have plenty of experience in observing males in their natural habitat and can easily translate that to my books.

What I have to be careful about is making sure my men are not cookie-cutter replicas of people I know and that they each have their own personality. I have to make sure that their motivations and desires reflect what is right for the plot. 

The hardest part is making sure my female characters react to each male character as suits their personality. Obviously, my female sleuth can’t respond to her friend , a police detective, the way she does to her lover. I also have to make sure the men don’t all treat her the same way. That wouldn’t be realistic. The most important thing to remember is that they are just people, too. 

The one thing I’d have the most difficult time writing would be a man’s thoughts during sex. Obviously, my brothers and coworkers don’t talk about that to me! But I don’t write sex scenes, so I’m off the hook.

There’s one male character who I have a real hard time writing, and that’s Jake, my anti-hero in the Harmony Duprie Mysteries. Or is he a villain? I’m not sure, he has secrets he’s not telling. 

Now, follow the links below to see what the others in the hop find the most difficult about writing their “opposite sex” characters.

June 10, 2019

What’s the most difficult thing about writing characters from the opposite sex?

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5 Comments

  1. It’s probably best you don’t know what a man thinks during sex!

  2. Yeah, emotional adultery – always try to avoid that — so I don’t know if I could write sex from the male perspective. My husband is generally quite willing to discuss any male topic I bring up and we have talked about sex from his perspective. But my male characters are not him and my female characters are not me, so I think I’d end up feeling like a voyeur. I prefer to provide enough evidence that readers know my characters are having sex and that most of them enjoy it. They can fill in whatever they want when I cut to the next scene.

  3. I think it would be a bad thing to know what your partner was thinking during sex. I think it would distract from the experience.

  4. I’ve always thought that to a certain extent, the characters create themselves in my imagination, based on the needs of the plot. And if you look at it like that, then their gender is only one part of their persona. In a way; it may not even be crucial, as long as its authentic and believable.

    • I thought about that as I was writing my post. (and my characters frequently surprise me with personality traits I didn’t expect!)

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